John Matrix Lumber Co. - Long Sleeve T-Shirt Size:M Arched distressed white serif text

Arched distressed white serif text reads "I ATE AN" across the top

Inspired by The Shawshank Redemption

Bold black slab-serif uppercase text reads "SPACEBALLS" in large letters

Wonderboy came from a tree that got struck by lightning

Randolph and Mortimer's portfolio diversification strategy was just cruelty with a dress code

John Matrix Lumber Co. - Long Sleeve T-Shirt Size:M Arched distressed white serif textRetiring from spec ops to carry logs sounds peaceful until the customer retention strategy involves holding people off cliffs by one ankle. Bennett showing up in chainmail really complicates the small business loan. Inspired by Commando. The Details: A cartoon illustration of John Matrix in a white tank top carries a brown log over one shoulder, flanked by green pine trees. A gray crosscut saw banner with brown handles displays dark block serif text